Thursday, 18 September 2008

The end of a road...

I've been away a fortnight and it seems like forever. When I look back on the last 15 days, I can only marvel at how so many things can change in so little time, and how other things will never change no matter how much time passes. I did not have much time to just sit and think in these days, but upon retrospection, I remain amazed at how much I can think about.

When I left from here, to wrap up my life, I was filled with fear and apphrehension. I was unsure about everything, and insecure about the future. There was just one little milestone to cross, which seemed miles away from where I was standing. From that point, the destination seemed so close, and yet so intangible. A mirage formed in front of me, of somewhere I wanted to be, but didn't know whether it was a real place or not. I did the only thing I could, I walked on.

A little further down the road, I met with obstacles, which I did my best to tackle. I was knocked over a couple of times, but my people held their hands out to me and pulled me back up. As I struggled through the rocks on the road, people kept giving me the tools to be able to break them. At one point, I almost gave up and sat on the side of the road, with tears in my eyes and helpness in my mind. I thought of dropping everything right there, and slowly turn around and make my way back from where I started, and look for an easier and shorter road, with lesser obstacles. As I turned around, a strong pair of arms caught hold of my shoulders and held firm. They made me stop and gave me the reassurance that my milestone is just beyond this last rock, and I need to go on, and not turn around at this point. The Person held my hand and walked me to the rock and handed me the tools, and told me I only had to look back and he'd be right behind me. I had to go on, just had to go on. So I did, I went on.

After a few more blows, that obstacle was beat too, and I found myself right in front of my milestone. It wasn't a mirage, it was solid and tangible. I took two more steps, and reached out and touched it. A wave of elation surged through me as I caressed the milestone. A looked around, and My People were there, right behind me, smiling with me, happy for me. They held my shaking body, and felt the worries being released from me. I could see the happiness in their eyes, I could sense the sincerity in their smile. In that moment, I felt the same fuzzy warmth in my chest, and I knew I'd just felt the first air of achievement. I had achieved, and I had My People to share this moment with. Bliss, pure bliss.

I'm back here now, after accomplishing my last task. I'm happy to have completed what I once started, no matter how much I had to tackle and dodge, I'm glad it's behind me now. My People are always there with me, and I'm sure of this more than ever now. There will be more boulders and rocks and stones in my way, but I know, whenever I look back, My People will be there to tell me I can go on, and I will go on.

Though here at journey's end I lie
In darkness buried deep,
Beyond all towers strong and high,
Beyond all mountains steep,
Above all shadows rides the Sun
And Stars for ever dwell:
I will not say the Day is done,
Nor bid the Stars farewell.

J.R.R Tolkein

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow. Keep this optimism and spirit with you all your life - even when you are going through rough patches (believe me there will be many)... :-)

Munir

Neha said...

Munir: Optimism is such a thing, no matter how hard I try to get rid of it...it sticks by me and keeps coming right back :)! PS: Its soooo nice that u're commenting regularly on my blog, thanx a bunch! I really look forwarded to reading ur comments :)!

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

You know Neha, I read this when I came back from my "vacation". I didn't comment then because I read it on my phone.

What I wanted to say was this was EXACTLY how I felt at that moment. I appreciate each and every sentiment behind those words and can gauge what you mean.

Really, why didn't we "meet" earlier. We obviously are each other, just living in some other dimension. :P ...

Neha said...

Rambo: Hehe, this is like the gazillionth time that we comment on each other's blog saying, "this is EXACTLY how I was feeling"...or "I can sooo relate to that"...hehe! We indeeed ARE the same person :). That's alright...we're quite cool and irresistable :p..right?

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